I just got done watching our hot gymnasts take the Gold and Silver. Apparently that’s the first time in history it has ever been done. Too bad China had to get the Bronze. Considering the fact that their entire gymnastics team is too young to participate by the rules, I take some solace in the fact that we took them down a notch. Lying Commie bastards!

Plenty of good news for the U.S.A. on the Olympics front. First, we’ve overtaken the Chinese in the total medal count, though they are still crushing us in overall Gold medals. Our golds look ever sadder when you realize that Michael Phelps accounts for six of them. The guy has more gold medals himself than 98% of the countries participating.

Speaking of Aquaman, he continues to destroy every race he participates in. If he wins his next 2 races, he’ll break Mark Spitz’s record of 7 gold medals in one Olympics. NBC is trying to keep the drama going by insisting that his next race is the only one he doesn’t hold the world record in and that his American teammate has beaten him head to head. Why do I get the feeling that Phelps will give everyone a 10 second head start before he rolls their asses? Let’s get this straight people: if Phelps loses tomorrow, he’s not a failure. He’s got 6 gold medals and 6 world records so far, I think he’s proved how awesome he is . People are talking as if he’ll be some sort of disappointment if he doesn’t win all 8 golds.

Once again, I got up bright and early to watch our basketball team piss all over Greece. That score is a bit overstated, though. That margin of victory comes almost entirely from the second quarter. The other quarters were basically even. Still, it is nice to see us kicking ass in basketball again. Next up is the douches from Spain. Expect another revenge ass handing courtesy of D-Wade and company.

Next up is Track and Field where we can hopefully extend our medal count. Go U.S.A.!

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