Moscow Monster

Weird news story about some unclassifiable monster found in Russia. Apparently there’s a possibly-related story out of the Hamptons from this past summer, but I missed that one.

From the linked article:
New information is surfacing that the famed “Montauk Monster,” the dangerous, weird-looking and still-unidentified creature that washed ashore in the Hamptons this summer, may be only the latest in a longer line of weird unidentified monsters washing ashore around the globe.

In 2006, a little-noticed entry was posted to EnglishRussia.com, a blog that catalogs strange and interesting photos from our neighbor that you can see from Alaska. That photo essay showed the carcass of a strange, reptilian creature that some “Russian soldiers” had found on a beach on the island of Sakhalin. But just what kind of creature is impossible to say

“According to the bones and teeth — it is not a fish,” wrote the fellow who posted the photos. “According to its skeleton — it’s not a crocodile or alligator. It has a skin with hair or fur.”

This kid’s going to turn out well…

A 7-year-old went apeshit in an Australian zoo, feeding a bunch of animals to a crocodile.

“Zookeepers were horrified when they arrived at work on Wednesday morning to see Terry, an 11-foot long saltwater crocodile, feasting on his fellow showcase reptilians at the Alice Springs Reptile Centre in the Northern Territory.

At first they thought the animals, including the zoo’s favourite, metre-long, 20-year-old goanna, had escaped from their outdoor pens and accidentally become breakfast for Terry - the local zoo’s prize attraction.

But further investigation uncovered CCTV footage of the local boy’s horrific 35-minute killing spree which began when he scaled the fence of the zoo, located in the centre of Alice Springs, a popular tourist destination town in central Australia, just before 8am on Wednesday morning.

The blank-faced boy, who had evaded security cameras because of his slight size, then began his deadly rampage, smashing rocks on the heads of the reptiles and throwing them and other live animals into the crocodile enclosure, according to the zoo’s director Rex Neindorf.”

Needs more gore, not less!

I saw The Ruins last night and just now I checked its rating at Rotten Tomatoes. I think we’re going to talk more about it on the next Splattercast, so I won’t share all my thoughts here. In short, I liked it and would recommend it. The summary screenshot from RT above struck me funny because I thought the movie should have had a bit more gore, whereas the RT critics are saying it’s got too much already.

1-in-75 chance that you’re fucked…

…if you live on Mars. Stuff like this is interesting if you’re an astronomy nerd like I am.

I’m off to write my 102nd review now.

Vaginas! With Teeth!

Teeth

A movie about Mat’s worst nightmare! I’m not kidding. It’s a movie about vaginas…with teeth! The movie is about Dawn, who decides to go get her cooter checked out because something is wrong…down there. Mayhem ensues. Check out the trailer here.

Best Spam Email Subject Line Ever!

Erin’s cosmic massive shlong!

Priceless.

Why does science do this kind of stuff?

Germs sent into space come back stronger.

Isn’t this how the Blob remake starts?

Splattercast #44

Splattercast #44 has been posted and should now be available for you iTunes users.  It’s left me wondering, who would I rather go to the bar with: DeeJay or Coffin Joe?